Allegedly Funny Movies

Almost Heroes
Starring: Matthew Perry, Chris Farley and elderly Indians.
Plot: Lewis and Clark have competition.
Was it really much of a suprise Chris died the way he did? He was a great actor but man, he does not look good in a majority of his movies.

Austin Powers
Starring: Michael Meyers, Elisabeth Hurley, Michael Meyers and sadly no Wayne.
Plot: Secret agent Austin is taken out of suspended animation to combat the return of Dr. Evil.
It's all a great send-up of the whole Bond thing. Good, but could have been much better.

Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me
Starring: Michael Meyers, Heather Graham and hot pants.
Plot: Dr. Evil has a time travel machine.
Over in Britian "Shagged" is the same as the "F" word. It's a messed up world.
The movie drags a bit here and there but it's still much fun. Espically the 'I've gone cross-eyed' bit. More Trek fans need to watch this movie.

Baby's Day Out
It's fun to watch kids almost being run over!

Baseketball Starring: Trey Parker and Matt Stone.
Plot: A new sport takes over the country.
Trey and Matt are the creators of 'South Park' and it shows in this movie. Very little this day makes me laugh until I hurt but this movie does it each and every time.
Just a little niggling problem with this movie. Trey and Matt are supposed to be the heroes, however bumbling they might be. Yet they still intentionally treat their sidekick like so much crap they found at the bottom of their shoe. He didn't do anything! Bastards.

-- Beavis and Butthead Do America
Heh heh 'Do'.

-- Beverly Hills Ninja
Chris Farley waves deadly implements of destruction around. Not as scary as it sounds.

Big Momma's House
I got a headache from Martin Lawrence's character screeching all the time. Also, naked fat lady ass please stay off the screen, thank you very much

Blues Brothers
A jazz band travels across country for some important thing or another. Car crashes and songs happen. Very boring.

Blues Brothers 2000
If you've seen the first one, you've seen this one. I'm not kidding. Excluding the differences caused by no Belushi, it is EXACTLY the same.

Breakfast Club
Five high school students get detention. It's really quite a classic and I urge you to get it as soon as you can. But don't watch with your parents around because the only scene they will see will be Jude Law looking up Shannon's skirt. That always happens with parents. The movie could be three straight hours of praising the lord with one make out scene for three seconds they will teleport back from Pluto if need be, just to watch you watching those three seconds of making out.
Best Scene: When they sneak out of the library.
Worst Scene: All the smooching at the end. It just made no sense whatsoever.

Bushwhacked
Child endangerment is fun!

Chasing Amy
Starring: Ben Affleck, Joey Lauren Adams and stunt crotches.
Plot: Very little.
I know it's not a popular opinion, but damn it. I hated 'Chasing Amy'. It's as if Smith sucked up all the scenes cut from his other movies for being too dull and boring. Then he shook them up, jammed them into this mess and inflicted it on the public. The plot, supposedly, was for the Hero to romance a lesbian back to being straight (or bi). I guess. Kind of insulting when you think about it. "I know you like girls, but if you just met the riiight man." There is no chemistry between any of the characters.

Clerks
It's supposed to be in black and white, okay?
As a former Blockbuster employee, Randall is my hero. I wish I could spit Evian on stupid customers.

-- Crocodile Dundee 1 and 2
The same movie each time, but it's real cool.

Dear God
Please make the characters as interesting as the plot. Also, please send me Sandra Bullock. Amen.

Doc Hollywood
This results when you feed rejected comedy movie scripts into MegaHAL.
I liked the pig though.

Dogma
Starring: Jay and Silent Bob, Linda Forientino, Chris Rock, Salma Hayek and poop.
Plot: Two rogue angels' need to get back into heaven just might end up destroying all of reality.
If I hadn't already quit catholicism some time ago, the protests over this movie would have pushed me closer to it. It's FICTION, people. FICTION. Besides, all the Christians in the movie tried their best to do the right thing. Guess that's not acceptable when there's a fictional 13th apostle and the new prophets smoke dope. Oh no! Dope!

-- Don't Be A Menace To South Central While Drinking Your Juice In The Hood
It takes longer to say the title than it does to view the actual funny parts of the movie.

Dracula: Dead and Loving It
Forget killing Dracula. Drive a stake through my heart so I don't have to watch this movie ever again.

Dumb and Dumber
Worth it for the explosive diarrhea scene alone.

Earnest Goes Somewhere Or Another
"Hey, Vern! I'm dead! But my movies are cool!"
All the Earnest movies I've seen, anyway. Lots of people seem to expect it to be a comedy for adults and when that doesn't happen, the movies are 'bad' somehow.

Election
Starring: Matthew Broderick and Rene Witherspoon.
Plot: Hell if I know.
Just like "There's Something About Mary" only stupid.
Oh look, that still-shot caught the character in a funny expression! HAW HAW HAW!!
Oh, look, Broderick is ignoring his wife! Wait, that's not funny.
Stupid movie.

Empire Records
A bunch of semi-normal teens work at an independent music store.
Again, a classic like 'Breakfast Club'. No wacky hi-jinks or crazy escapades. Yes, it's funny. Yes, it's a comedy. While other comedies have Chris Farley pulling off nipple rings, 'Empire Records' has a double take when the manager passes a listening booth. Real life is funny and that's the kind of comedy in this movie.
After I saw the movie I worked a Christmas season in 'Sam Goody's'. What a mess. At certain times of the day we were assigned to specifict AISLES. Which made no sense as it was rare for the customer to actually be looking for what was in the aisle.

Best Scene: The performance at the end. Worse Scene: The GWAR video hallucination. It skeeved me out.

Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Ferris and two friends play hooky. Watch it, buy it, steal it, tatoo it's screen shots onto your buttocks, just get this movie somehow. (Okay, don't steal it. And tatoos are weird).
Best Scene: The parade.
Worst Scene: The freak-out by the hypochondriac at the pool. Time to take the dude to the hospital, Ferris, not another wacky adventure.

-- Forces Of Nature
Why did they even film this? Man, it stinks.

-- Ghostbusters 1 and 2
Again, identical movies but both of high quality. Some parts are scariet then most horror movies. Sadly, it isn't hard to do these days.

-- Grosse Pointe Blank
I really, really want that Doom2 arcade machine.

High Fidellity
John Cusack tries to write 'Empire Records' but forgot to add a plot. Or sympathetic characters. He did do okay on the dialogue but man did that not hold this movie together.

-- High School High
John Lovitz and Tia Carrare. Argh! They got to do kissy-face scenes! Is there no justice in the world?

-- Liar, Liar
Jim Carrey plays a lawyer who discovers that one day, he cannot tell a lie. He must tell the truth no matter what. At the end, his colleagues kill him and dine on his flesh.

Little Nicky
Satan's third kid tries to stop a Hellish coup. It's pretty good. Sandler had to invent yet another stupid annoying voice but that can be overlooked.

Lost And Found
Spade romances a foreign musician. I still regret not buying this movie when I had the chance. Spade is his self-absorbed character but turns it all around in time to win the girl. It's a 'chick flick' with enough weirdness so the stereotypical Hollywood guy can like it.

Mallrats
This, I like. Besides, flea markets always have better stuff then the regular malls anyway.
Did you know that picture of the sailboat wasn't *really* a sailboat? (Or so they say. With my lazy eyes those disguised pictures can be giant exposed rectums and I'd never be able to tell).

Man On The Moon
Watch 'Taxi' instead.

Me, Myself and Irene
Mental health advocates were complaining that this movie mis-portrayed the concept of 'multiple personalities'. Well, DUH.
By the way, it suckes.

Miss Congeniallity
Starring: Sandra Bullock, Michael Caine and the Amazing Immovable Face as the love interest.
I saw this in the theatre. Bad move. Gabbers aren't even bothering to WHISPER anymore. Plus, my glasses need to be let out another notch or two or seven and I got a throbbing headache.
Bullock must deal with finding a killer at a beauty pageant, depsite her colleague's mind boggling incompetence.

Scary Movie
Oddly enough, scarier then Scream 3.

Simply Irrisestible
Okay, I got because Sara Michelle Gellar was in it. It's still a good movie, unlike any romance-comedy I have ever seen.

-- South Park, Bigger Longer and Uncut
Trey Parker and Matt Stone do all they weren't allowed to do on TV.

-- Stripes
Half the Ghostbusters retrieve something or other from the evil Russkies.
Evil Russkies are cool. Too bad comedy movies stopped using them anymore. I blame the Evil Russkies.

Waterboy
Forrest Gump plays football and gets laid.

Wayne's World
Worth it just for the 'Bohemian Rhapsody' scene alone.

-- Wayne's World 2
As in most sequels, just like the original movie only not.

Wedding Singer
Anthing with Drew Barrymore makes it worth watching because hey, Drew. It's good anyway. Sandler doesn't cook up another annoying voice. The plot is ripped straight from every other romance comedy out there but hey, Drew.

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